The Talking Dog

April 8, 2010, Sportin' life


It does this middle aged White man good to see guys who are older and Whiter than him kicking ass... such as Fred Couples leading and Tom Watson one shot back after the first round at the Masters golf tournament. (Not my game, of course, and quite frankly, I'd ban the damned thing on environmental grounds... but still and all...) And, despite the compelling nature of the almost unprecedented situation-- a couple of over-50 men in the hunt for a major sporting championship-- Tiger Woods-- the only thing anyone cares about-- is only one shot behind Watson.

Good for you, Tiger, is all I have to say. I couldn't care less about your personal life: at least the sporting realm is an American institution honest enough to recognize that what happens in the field of play is all that matters, and your problems off the field are your affair (as it were), and not ours.

Sports, like everything else in this country, have been ruined by money. Tiger's issues are between he and Mrs. Woods. The only "public" issue with Tiger is his kazillion dollar made-up image, to sell Nike apparel (hence the creepy ad), GM cars, financial services and God knows what else (all of which have netted him many times his earnings from just playing golf) . His corporate sponsors, of course, profit from commoditizing everything in the universe (including sex, love, life, death...). And so, the fact that Tiger is a rather indiscriminate whoremonger becomes some kind of "problem" only because of "the image" that the people paying Tiger believe they are paying him to maintain. Well... fuck them and their role-model bullshit.

So, good for you, Tiger, in saying "fuck you" to corporate America, which, let's face it, is populated by people who are more clearly whores than any waitress or "nightclub hostess" that you've ever done. And good for you, Fred Couples, and Tom Watson, for showing everyone that middle aged White men still have it.

This has been... "Sportin' life."

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